On Wednesday, April 24 (the day before I am scheduled to deliver!), the Gibson Gang met my parents and sisters for dinner at Red Lobster in Newport News (which is about halfway from our hometown in Gloucester and the delivery site of Norfolk). Juuuuust as our food arrived, I discovered that I was having some light bleeding. Sooo, dinner was boxed up and my kiddos went with my parents and sisters to their hotel in Norfolk, and Ashley and I drove to the hospital.
Ashley and I checked into the hospital, and they checked all of my vitals, the baby, etc. There was no more bleeding, so I was able to "relax" and even get something to eat. Just as I dozed off to sleep, a little after midnight, I woke up to the frightening feeling of lots of bleeding. And juuuust to add a bit o' excitement to an already exciting scenario: the hospital was experiencing a power outage and was running solely on back-up generators. There was a lot of hustle and bustle and preparation of that fabulous crew of nurses as they prepped to do what needed to be done. I lost about 300 cc of blood, but the Lord stopped the bleeding and allowed me to rest (somewhat) the rest of the morning. My surgeon, Dr. Dattel, came in around 8:00 am to see me and to discuss what was going to happen. My original surgery time of 1:00 pm was going to be bumped up to 11:00 am.
The reality of what could possibly be the end was really moving in closely. I had spent a lot of time with the Lord, giving my worries and concerns for my sweet babies and hubby into the hands of a knowing God. I had a peace that if these were to be my last moments with my loves, it would be enough. I held my hubby's hand until they wheeled me out to the operating room. The Lord had already graciously provided a precious nurse, Gabrielle, to hold my hand and pray for me the entire way.
Obviously, the next few hours are a bit foggy, but my hubby kept me pretty informed! ;) Surgery began at 11:00 am, and Samuel Asher Gibson entered the world at 11:17. After that, Dr. Dattel began the removal of my placenta and uterus. The placenta was pretty powerful and had overtaken most everywhere from my belly button on down. She wasn't able to remove it all, and I lost about 4.5 liters of blood.
I was sent to the ICU, and I don't remember much except that those nurses were so wonderful. They monitored me and kept me so comfortable. I remember that when they had to remove the sheath from my leg (because of embolization) the nurse, John, had to literally hold pressure on my leg for 20 minutes so that I wouldn't bleed out. I remember several of the nurses from the night before (you know, the power outage excitement) came to check on me-- most of them waiting long past their shift was over just to be able to make sure that I was really going to pull through. I remember one nurse in particular went and took pictures of my Samuel, printed them off, and taped them to my bedside so that I could see him. I remember getting three chemo shots to help kill off the remaining placenta and uterus. I remember those nurses holding my hands and assuring me that I would indeed be able to nurse my baby in spite of all of this. I remember that those ICU nurses saved my life.
Three different times, three different chaplains came in to see me. I remember at the time thinking that it was a little strange. But, now as I look back, I know it's because of how sick I was. But, I knew. I knew that so many people were praying. And I had so much peace.
The next 5 days were really rough. The main thing I remember is the vomiting. A lot. At one point, I had six different IV's hooked up to me, trying to get everything all balanced out. Even now, over 2 weeks past all this, I still have arms that look like a kindergartener just discovered the purple and black permanent markers, and went crazy with them!
Samuel was born on Thursday. And he was perfect. He came out kicking and screaming (just as I had prayed so fervently!). He couldn't come to me, but I was allowed to go to him. On Monday, Ashe wheeled me down to the nursery so I could see my sweet boy. The smells and lights about did me in. I made it to the nursery, but I was already so ill, I couldn't even pick him up. I remember worrying that he wouldn't remember me, but all I said was, "Oh, sweet boy..." He turned that little head so fast to find me, that even now it makes me weep. I had to go back to my room, but Tuesday morning was feeling much better. I was even put into a "normal" room! The lactation nurse brought my baby to me and I got to hold him for the very first time. Oh, what a miracle. He even latched right on and nursed like a pro! God is... so good.
I had to continue to stay in the hospital until May 4 because of severe abdominal pain, more vomiting, and other complications. However, I knew a miracle was truly done by an amazing God. And as I sat in my room, FINALLY getting ready to go home. I will never forget the reality of what the Lord had brought me through, just washing over me. I had prepared my heart and life to the reality that I would not get to see my sweet babies again. I was ready to be called home. And in an instant, as looked into the face of my sweet Samuel, my tears flowed so freely as my heart rejoiced: the Lord was letting me go home! He let me stay, and He let me be that mama again.
All throughout this pregnancy, a verse that has just whispered and rolled through my very being is Psalm 62:1, "When my heart is overwhelmed, lead me to the Rock that is higher than I..." Indeed, my feet have been placed on higher ground!
